I had an idea in my head for my illustration of the Trauma Tree for my post on traumatic growth. Having taken a few photos of some contenders I found the “perfect” real life reference.
(yes that tree is a real tree growing in the Texas Hill Country.)
I then did a pencil sketch, and filled it in with ink. Just as I was finishing the inking I noticed a mistake I had made. I had spelled “trauma” as “trama.” Uh oh. Spelling is one of my weak spots, I just don’t see it. The whole idea behind sketching in pencil is to catch mistakes like that too. So I had gone over it twice before I ever saw it. My husband suggested I use the illustration as it was and just own up to the mistake.
But I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t put out something I had worked so hard on as flawed! All kinds of uncomfortable feelings come up about that.
So I fussed and fussed with it in GIMP to correct the error I had made. And now there are these little weird artifacts from the digital manipulation. That’s where I had to close my eyes and just think “good enough, it’s good enough.” This is something I talk to my gifted clients about in the therapy room. Good enough is good enough. But accepting good enough can be so hard.
Us gifted people can put such high standards on ourselves. Sometimes these standards require us to put in extra energy and do extra work, like my digital correction. And sometimes these standards can stop us from even trying something because we know we won’t hit the mark, so why bother?
Because the belief is, “if it is perfect (if I am perfect) then no one can reject my work (reject me)” And yet I know that other peoples’ perfect work is intimidating to me. Near perfection is harder to approach. Sometimes is it easier to accept something a little dinged up, a little comfortable. To see the humanity in it, to see that others struggle just like I do.
I heard once that Navajo artists believe that they have to create a deliberate imperfection in their work so their souls won’t get trapped in the creation. Whether this is true or not, I like the idea of an imperfect escape route. Because truly it is impossible to achieve perfect work. So why not embrace imperfection? Create deliberate flaws? There is so much more room in imperfection.
And that’s why I decided that I will own up to my mistake after all. Here, in this secondary post. Life has bumps and contours and scars and wrinkles, and that is what makes it interesting. Not perfection.
Good enough is good enough
Good enough is good enough
Good enough is good enough